I have run across the following anecdote, or something like it, twice. I wish I knew who to credit for authorship. Maybe it evolved through contributions of several people; I just don't know. If you do know who wrote this, please send email to rkoning@snet.net so I can give proper credit for the ideas. In any case, please understand that I did not write this and so please do not give me credit for it.
Why God Never Got Tenure
- Had only one major publication.
- Publication was in obscure languages.
- It had no references.
- It wasn't published in a refereed journal.
- Some doubt authorship.
- It may be true that God created the universe, but what has God done for the program since then?
- God's cooperative efforts have been quite limited.
- Does not participate in departmental committee meetings.
- Does not laugh at the Academic VP's off-color jokes.
- The scientific community has had a hard time replicating God's results.
- Has never applied to the Ethics Board for permission to use human subjects.
- When subjects did not behave as predicted, they were deleted from the sample.
- Refuses to grade on the curve...everything is Pass-Fail.
- Rarely comes to class, just tells students to read the Book.
- Some say son teaches the class.
- Expelled first two students for learning too much.
- Although there are only ten course requirements, most students failed test.
- Offices hours are infrequent and usually held on a remote mountaintop.
This page © Ross E. Koning 1994.
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